Mission accomplished!

I feel a bit like a Pilgrim setting up a charter in New England, but, yes, we set out with a mission to go around the world and we have done just that. Well, mostly. We left the United States from the Western edge of the Atlantic Ocean and are now situated on one of Europe's farthest westward reaching Atlantic coastlines, but aren't done yet! We have been in Portugal for only a day now and we enjoy it thoroughly so far. Portugal has always been a bit of a mystery for us. At this point we are fairly well traveled and have met many other travelers from every corner of the globe, but until yesterday I didn't know a single Portuguese. It has been rationalized to us by the mere fact that the entire nation is just a touch larger than the population of New York City, but with slightly less spending power and thus traveling abilities. So, yes, Portugal is great, as was our far too quick jaunt through Spain and France. In France we were lucky enough to meet up with two of our friends from the good old days in the Australian camper can - Laurene and Olivier. It was so nice to see some beloved familiar faces despite being a bit shocked that we have been doing 6 months of continual traveling since last seeing them. After visiting them in Lyon, we had a few days to explore the Basque country on both the French and Spanish side and it was not only a beautiful region, but it seems as though the people there have a heightened awareness and appreciation of the beauty of their land and culture that seemed to make it a very nice region in which to live. The reason we are moving quite quickly through this area of the world is that tomorrow we are meeting my mother in Lisbon for two weeks of travel through Portugal and Spain (yes, George was invited too) that is sure to be a lovely time and a long anticipated reunion!
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Germany (especially Germans) are spectacular

As the radio is particularly bad on this sunny Sunday afternoon spent flying down the autobahn in the mostly trustworthy George mobile, I have time enough to reflect on the 5 weeks that we have spent in and out of Germany which today officially comes to a close as we are headed to Switzerland. Germans are great, albeit chain smokers, who have been very friendly, thoughtful, and bearers of good conversations.

After a most interesting week spent in Poland getting an education on the Soviet Bloc, we went to Berlin and did pretty much everything someone of our generation 'should' do while there - we spent time in awe of the Pergamon Altar (a masterpiece of Hellenistic Greece that the Germans replanted to Germany in order to 'protect' it), drank delicious German beer in dingy bars, discussed contemporary art and cinema, and stayed up way too late dancing. Berlin seems to be an extremely complicated city with everything from pristine commerical and the yuppies that go along with it to areas of grafittied, mostly abandoned buildings inhabited by anarchists and Turkish immigrants. The remnants of the Wall and the division it represented is ever present, but, for me, it wasn't depressing as the city is so alive with a constant stream of artists coming to the city to benefit from the city's massive arts initiative program. Most importantly while in Berlin, our dear friend Paula joined us and has already folded into our lifestyle and all signs point to her approving of said lifestyle. It occurs to me that what we do on a daily basis remains a mystery to most people and so I think Paula should write a little guest blog in a bit to give her opinion of this life of ours. After leaving Berlin we drove to Nuremburg with the intention of staying for a short while and then making the short trip to Munich to spend a day at Oktoberfest. Instead of spending too much money drinking with British and Japanese tourists in an overcrowded tent as we were told we would, we decided to stay in lovely Nuremburg and make our own Oktoberfest and I must say, we did pretty well for ourselves. We watched a soccer match while at a beer garden, ate traditional Bavarian food, learned how to pour and drink proper Bavarian beer from proper Bavarians. In other words, Germany has been very good to us. As we cross the border into Switzerland, a new phase of our European chapter begins - the mad dash to Portugal. We will spend the next ten days 5 countries with the goal of meeting up with my mother in Lisbon for a much anticipated tour through Portugal and Spain. We are often told how 'American' our plan to drive such a distance in such a short period of time is, but we are looking forward to it as we anticipate it being very beautiful drive, and besides, the possibilities for adventure are endless.
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#17 (countries, that is)

Hello from Poland. If I knew how to say/write hello in Polish I would, but let's not kid ourselves here. However, I DO know how to say "dziekuje" ( pronounced something like "gin qu yay") which means thank you, never mind that I get laughed at almost everytime I say it due to what I guess is poor pronunciation. Oh, I also know how to say "nastrovia!" which is synonymous to our "cheers!" pre shot. What else have I learned since being in Poland?
1. I cannot keep up drink for drink with 3 polish men, though I tried valiantly.
2. Pierogies (dumpling-like things filled with cheese, potatoes, or sauerkraut) are the only things that will make you feel better after trying to keep up drink for drink with 3 polish men.
3. Polish highschools are the same as highschools in the states.

I will elaborate on that last one since it didn't really flow with my previous train of thinking. We were asked by a friend who teaches English at a local Polish highschool in Kolobrzeg to come in and talk to the students about our travels and our lives in the states. Laura, who does not have the fondest high school memories, actually reported feeling nervous as we walked through the doors and throngs of youngsters copying homework, flirting, and texting. They were just like us 7 years ago. The building itself also had an eerie familiarity - walls painted a terrible shade of olive, smells of burning oil from the cafeteria and bleach from the bathrooms, and the ubiquitous flickering flourescent light fixtures that I am now convinced are put there by THE MAN to induce headaches in students worldwide. But, Laura worked through her anxiety (plus, I promised her that if any girl was mean to her, I would steal that girl's boyfriend) and we ended up having a great time with the students sharing our pictures and stories.
The students and teachers also helped to give us a history lesson about the eastern European bloc, as we talked a lot about Poland's tendency to be invaded, and eventually the success of post-Solidarity Poland.

Life in the GeorgeMobile is well. Ah, yes, we have christened the minivan in honor of the one CD we could afford at the used record place in Germany - Faith, by George Michael. A classic for sure, and it came with a nifty poster that has a place of honor in the front. We have been enjoying driving around the Polish countryside, blasting the sounds of our man George, making friends, and exploring this oh so fascinating part of the world.

For Marcus, just to let you know we are still keeping count: us 311 world 15. Yah, we are still kicking bootay.
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Back in the West

These photos may be in need of captioning - in no particular order they are my leg after falling down some wet steps, Jess' shoes being laid to rest in a mall trash bin, me with the biggest dyke in Holland(!) and the precious little town of Edam.

Less than 20 days in Europe and so much has happened - I suppose that is what can happen when you can drive through multiple countries and experience their unique cultures and languages within a few hours. Flying into the Frankfurt International Airport was like any other fancy, big airport we have been in lately. The public transportation, however, felt very, well, German. It was so clean that it didn't have any smell and instead of using the area surrounding the train tracks as your trash bin, there not only was a trash bin on the train, but next to every set of seats! It was also silent - an experience we have not had in a very very long time. When we emerged into one of Frankfurt's main squares in the middle of a workday, the sight actually caused us to stumble a few steps back in shock - there was no one there! Well, hardly anyone...and the people that were there were not trying to sell anything, befriend us, or try to get our attention in any way. As a contrast, on our final taxi ride to the Delhi airport while sitting in traffic, an Indian ladyboy (I am forgetting the proper term now but Hindus believe they have mystical powers and can curse you) stuck her (his) hand into the car with neatly folded 10 rupee notes between her fingers urging me to add to the collection by smiling, batting her eyelids, and repeatedly jabbing my thigh with her hand. Jess on the other side of the taxi is having fashion magazines opened and thrown in her face while she is simultaneously yelling at the ladyboy to leave me alone. Moral of the story, if something goes terribly wrong for us, it is because we didn't give some rupees to the ladyboy AND the transition from India to Germany felt like we were both coming home to a familiar place and entering an alternate universe as the two countries could not be more of a contrast. That being said, we loved India - there is truly no place like it on earth that we have been to - and being in western Europe has also been spectacular. Drinking tap water, eating salad, and not being grimy at the end of a day are all greatly appreciated novelties for us.

While still transitioning to life in the West we thought it high time to buy a car. Please do not jump to conclusions by assuming that Jess and I are prepping our families and friends for the announcement of a civil union with our decision to buy a minivan, but yes it just so happens that a minivan is the most responsible and biggest purchase that we have made individually or as a unit. We had been told that buying a car in Europe while not being a part of the European Union is nearly impossible, but hey, we like a challenge. We found a guy on the internet in the city of Koblenz near to Frankfurt who sold campervans and also bought them back when travelers were done with them. After realizing that we actually cannot drive manual cars not to mention an old VW Westfalia on the Autobahn, we decided to try our luck elsewhere. We proceeded to spend the next 3 days in the office of a Lebanese man who refused to speak English to us and was referred to only as chief by his trusty assistant and our new friend. Before setting off in the sun with our legally registered, export plate-d minivan, we discovered that Koblenz is actually a lovely city filled with historic buildings, a rich history, and darling people. We then continued on to Cologne, Bruges in Belgium, a few small cities in the Netherlands including Amsterdam, and then back into Germany to Bremen a few days ago and Hamburg as of yesterday. I think this is the fastest we have been moving in the past 10 plus months, but getting in our lovely minivan every few days and driving for a few hours through lovely countryside is not so difficult a task. Here is a varied list of things we have learned recently - Belgian waffles really are better in Belgium, the cheese in Edam really is as good as you would think (Jess snarkily points out how much sample cheese I ate there), blonde children might just be the cutest, our minivan does indeed have a CD player and Melanie C isn't so bad, electrical tape does not permanently repair shoes, Jess is average size for a woman in the countries recently visited, my German is not so shizey, Holland and Netherlands (colloquially) are the same thing, Lebanese men know how to export a car, swans are nearly deadly, Belgian beer really is that delicious, Colin Farell is sadly not running around Bruges, Formula 1 racing might actually be interesting, German bars really look like how they are imitated to be in the states, neo-Nazis exist, Grimm fairy tales can really help a city's tourism, the west is obsessed with cleanliness and there are no smells here, Van Gogh didn't start painting until the last 10 years of his life, finding a parking spot for a minivan is not so easy in a city planned a thousand years ago, and to round the list out, people are kind to us wherever we go.

Jess and I, being of a certain breed, are naturally inclined to plan and perhaps you could go so far as to say that we can even overthink things on occasion. Thankfully, traveling beat that out of us pretty quickly so here we are, in Hamburg, with our minivan embarking tomorrow on a journey into former Soviet occupied Germany and Poland. We decided this yesterday and think it will be great fun - vodka, accordions, perogies and all.
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Ch-ch-changes!

We have been slacking and thus have a myriad of updates to announce. I will proceed in chronological order - first, we have adopted a kitten, or perhaps she has adopted us. While Jess was reading in bed, she heard the most pitiful whining and before she could identify the source, she had a little, black alien kitten curling up under her chin. We have named her Kitten, a classic, and have spent the last few weeks becoming too attached to her whiny, playful little self while being amazed by her growth and progress. As I said, she looked like an alien with huge eyes and protruding cheek bones, and is now just an adorable 6-ish week old kitten who has now worked up to catching and eating little lizards and spiders! We are very proud mothers, yet have failed her in a way by transforming her from a survivor, orphan kitten to a domesticated baby who sleeps only when having direct contact with a warm body (in other words, German neighbor Deiter's method of putting her in a small plastic bucket at night is unsatisfactory for both Kitten and me). We are currently trying to recruit some equally sappy, sentimental kitten-keepers to look after her when we leave, which is quite soon because...

We are officially yoga teachers! After a month of daily practice, leading classes, and putting our bodies in new, unforeseen positions, we are certified. One may think we would be the very vision of health, alas...

We are both sick! Well kind of, mine is self- inflicted as I have decided to do this Ayurvedic cleanse called Panchakarma that has been hip and trendy in India for say, the last 5,000 years, and has just caught on in the greater Los Angeles. Jessica warns me against sharing this as all of the Los Angelinos will judge me for giving into the latest of the Hollywood health fads along with Lindsay Lohan and Madonna, alas the 2 week treatment comes to a close tomorrow and it has been a most fascinating experience. Unlike western medicine that concentrates on curing the physical with medication while discounting the role of the emotional and mental self, Ayurveda takes all three as equally influential on the functioning of the body and its health. The point of the cleanse is to take the toxins out of the body which means that the doctor took a wooden stick and pressed it into very specific pressure points all over my body provoking the organs to release the stored toxins. So for a few days I walked around with 23 years of toxins flowing out of my organs causing me to be weak, nauseas, and a little unhinged - generally a joy to be around. The toxins are now out and I feel very, well, clean. Our fair, sensitive Jessica, however, is legitimately ill and didn't even invite it as I did. She has Giardia, not to be confused with the amoebas that she had a few weeks ago (and may still have), which is a hearty, hard-shelled parasite that is forming an army in her digestive system as we speak. It doesn't take excellent hearing to sense that something is amiss as her stomach sounds like the belly of a ship during a tempestuous crossing of the Atlantic. This most recent development has caused me to pull a mom move. I am not the best at channeling my maternal instincts, but I suppose that when I do, they come full force. We are flying to Germany in less than a week.

Ah the joys of living without plans and commitments...I was sitting at the computer with the task of buying our plane tickets to fly to Germany at the beginning of September and started to think that the next few weeks might be spent in a bathroom instead of on a camel or motorbike as planned. With this very sudden change of plans, lifestyle, and mentality, we will be arriving in Frankfurt with the mission of buying a cheap, used car and embarking on an epic road trip alllll over Europe in what is surreally the final leg of THIS around the world adventure.
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We had a baby!!!

Don't worry mom, that was just an analogy. An analogy that we feel is appropriate given the fact that we have been traveling for 9 months and 3 days. And, it strikes Laura and I that there are some eerie similarities between our 9 months of travel, and the things a woman experiences when letting a baby live inside her. I am told that the first trimester can be the hardest, and it is fair to say that the first few months of our trip were the most difficult mentally and physically. Looking back we really had no idea what we were doing, and that showed. But as time passed, we got more comfortable with traveling, and the major morning sickness feelings passed only to be replaced by little kicks every once in awhile. While those kicks were sometimes uncomfortable, they were also reminders of how special traveling is, and how something like this trip sometimes has a mind of its own. Finally, the last push to the 9 month mark was challenging in a very physical way as both Laura and I found ourselves as sick as 2 girls our age can be, but now, a few days past major sickness symptoms, we are feeling rather proud of ourselves. And we have this incredible trip, that is still far from finished, but at this point we realize that it has become a life all on its own, that often we cannot control. We are just happy to be along for the ride. Please send flowers and stuffed animals to 600 stairs north of Baghsu.

Other thoughts, and emails from concerned friends and family, have lead me to realize that according to the last few blogs, my personal India experience has been nothing but guns and squat toilets. Hence I will now list, for your reading pleasure, 10 wonderful things that have happened to me in India that do not involve train jail cells, men harassing me, or anything you can read about on webMD.

Ahem ...

1. I met the nicest boy and his little sister in Varanasi. He was maybe 12 years old, and just was the cutest. He wanted to talk about everything American, was more than happy to explain the mysteries of cricket to me, and I watched his eyes grow as big as mangoes when I told him I lived near Hollywood.

2. Mangoes - mangoes here are the most delicious!!! We eat as many as possible, and I am always the most satisfied after a meal if I am washing the sticky sweetness of a huge mango off my hands.

3. I watch Laura's headstand improve everyday. This is sometimes comical, but mostly awesome.

4. I had to take a moment to really just STARE at the Taj Mahal. It was that beautiful.

5. We have made some great expat friends, all who have shown Laura and I the ropes. People who do not hesitate to share their homes, or their chappati, or their knowledge of the local bus system.

6. I learned to make Indian food! I am now the proud chef of paneer butter masala (as healthy as it sounds, btw ... That is sarcasm for those who can't pick up on my dry humor on the interweb) as well as Dal Fry, hands down one of my favorite Indian dishes.

7. I have been initiated into the great tradition of Indian crystals and jewelry, thanks to a friend who was shopping wholesale for things to sell when she returned home. I spent hours picking out the most beautiful things, and though I am the skeptic sometimes, I really did feel the energy when I held the funny Merlin-esque crystal magic wand in my hand.

8. Once, after the most frusturating day ever in Chandigarh, and before a sleepless nightbus ride, a very nice middle aged Indian woman struck up conversation with me because she could see that "my face needed a friend." This encounter literally warmed my soul, especially since women are encouraged to be seen as rarely as possible and not heard at all when in public places in India.

9. Because of the climate in southern India, avocados are relatively plentiful in the area where Laura and I are currently. For a girl who grew up with an avocado tree in her backyard, this is a very, VERY good thing.

10. Who remembers the ridiculous white pants that Laura and I had to buy for the 4 day meditation in Chiang Mai, Thailand? Well, they have been put to good use in yoga class, and we do so much yoga, it is fabulous.

How's that for a good time? Xoxo
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Quintessentially India

Ah India, a complex and diverse land...a place where Giardia, Gurus, and Gandhi are all terms commonly thrown around in our conversations these days. We are 10 days into our yoga teacher training course and I suppose we are checking a lot of the 'to-dos' of India off the list - we sit around with our old German neighbor, Deiter, who hitchhiked TO India in 1969 and has more or less been here since, and are educated on such topics as the CIA's successful plotting to assassinate Indira Gandhi (note to government agents: plots by the CIA to kill Indians is a popular theme on this mountain, so beware) and the Bavarian Illuminati's current and past control of society as we know it.

Something else that has punctuated our time here thus far is the confirmation that we have amoebas living in our tumtums - to be in India for three months especially during the monsoon season and hope not to get sick would just be foolhardy so in a way we are feeling like it is a badge of merit. Perhaps this is my opinion as such because I, unlike the lady I share a room with, did not spend multiple days more or less sleeping in a squat toilet outhouse. I recently read that a person should not make her life an open book, so suffice it to say that Jess' symptoms ranged from those of Giardia to Dysentry over the past few days and webMD can provide further elaboration.

While Jess was slimming down, I was taking steps towards spiritual enlightenment, or so I'm told. Our yoga instructor, Shivam, invited a group of us to come celebrate 'Guru purnuma' at his guru's ashram - it is a yearly celebration in India during which devotees visit their gurus and give thanks. As the full moon auspiciously rose in the sky we made our way through a small town of terraced farms. We reached the ashram with our hands filled with Indian sweets and flowers as a gift and were met with a surprisingly casual scene. We walked into a room where a few people were sitting on the floor chatting with a very tall, very thin bearded man cloaked in orange robes and with a pile of dreadlocks wrapped on the top of his head. I understand the inherent skepticism that some may feel when they hear the term 'guru' - new wave cults and quack financial advisors. In Hindi, 'gu' means dark and 'ru' light so a guru is anyone who turns darkness into light for you through his teachings (I think it also helps to be able to sit in double lotus pose - Jess says that if my hips get a little looser and I can get into that position, she will name me her guru. The only setback with this might be the whole discrimination of women as impure and lesser beings detail...). Regardless, this man had the kindest eyes and warmest demeanor so I can see how people would be drawn to him. We spent the night listening to his followers sing devotional music with the accompaniment of a harmonium, drums, and bells and being mildly embarrassed by Shivam who has this habit of flailing his body and head around while singing out of tune during meditation. We slept on the roof of the meditation hall and were woken up early by chanting so I made my way to a grassy knoll to read a book while waiting for whatever it was that was going to happen to unfold. The guru walked over to me and asked what I was reading - I told him it is about the Yoga Sutra and he was delighted to hear that I practice yoga and says he does also. He then asks me if I understand everything about yoga and I say certainly not and ask him if he had any advice for me to improve my meditation. He replies that he will think about it and tell me when it is quieter. Later when more and more of his devotees are coming to give him and us some not so delicious buttery sweets that we are unable to refuse, he points to me while speaking to Shivam in Hindi and beckons me to his side to ask my question again. As you may imagine, the already inclined to staring Indians are really taking in this white girl and her interactions with guruji. While kneeling next to him, he orders Shivam to do something and I am told to follow. I am ordered to stand next to the puja, a religious firepit, and throw ashes into the flame five times while repeating the chant of a group of religious men in robes that have surrounded me and then genuflect with my hands in namaste (prayer) at the base of the altar. Yes, a little strange and idol worship-y, I then returned to the side of the guru and was told to place the red vermillion paste on his toe and third eye while he gave me a blessing. This was all a mystery to me until Shivam very excitedly explained it all to me afterwards. He said that it was a big deal that guruji would actually answer my question, not just let me ask it, and this was because the guru and Shivam both sensed that my energy was 'pure' and 'joyful' (you may recall the conch shell lady in Varanasi saying Jess was the one with the good aura and I was too much of a thinker, but different strokes for different folks/spiritual guides I suppose). Moral of the story, the mantra I chanted is now my 'guru mantra' as it was given to me by one and I should use that in my practice.

Once returned from the ashram, I was met by a very pale, pitiful Jessica and must have been overcome with sympathy pains as we both walked down the mountain early the next morning to make our way to the hospital. I'm not quite sure one could say she has really lived if she hasn't walked down hundreds of stone steps in the early dawn hours with a stool sample in a used coffee can/gherkins jar to a medical clinic overseen by His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama.

In between feeling exhausted and trying to improve our health through a combination of antibiotics, raw garlic, grapefruit seed extract, black salt water, and aloe vera juice (one or a combination of which may possibly be making us manic as we spend hours in fits of uncontrollable, idiotic laughter which is balanced by short bursts of intense agitation - any thoughts medical personnel?), we have enjoyed not planning our next move, practicing a whole lot of yoga, and getting to know those around us. One of our favorites is Sunil, our resident Sanskrit scholar, who is teaching us Vedic mantras as part of our training. He has minimal confidence in his English, but it is easy enough to figure him out through his impassioned singing and his expressive moves as he has been joining us in class. Yesterday he convinced Muriel, a woman in our course, to be tied up with the straps we use in class so that he could put the straps in his mouth and lift her body with his teeth alone. A most interesting mating technique.

An odd note to end on, yes, but the thick fog encompassing the mountain right now that makes us feel like we are on a platform detached from Earth is having a similar affect on my mind.
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